It takes a special kind of person to see the trailer for 50 Shades of Grey and think, “Dogs!” But that’s what Annie and Buddy’s owner thought, and before anybody could stop her, she’d redone the slick, slightly embarrassing trailer into her own version, which contained no dashing Jamie Dornan, no smoldering Dakota Johnson, no languid Bugs Bunny but rather, dogs! Very handsome dogs, of course, but nonetheless: Dogs.

Fortunately for us, the filmmaker left the whips and chains and handcuffs and air freshener and leather thingamajigs and satin whoiswhatsits and latex jimmywahoos on the editing room floor, and for good reason. No one wants to see Golden Retrievers dealing with graphic adult sexual hardware. A blindfold, okay. We can deal with a blindfold:

Also a dog chain, because it’s time to go for a walk:

And have a nice drive in the car:

Watch the whole vid:

Why dogs? Part of the reason is that the filmmaker has a habit of making videos of her wonderful dogs — she’s behind 2010’s smash “Breakfast at Ginger’s — Golden Retriever Dog Eats With Hands,” which has nearly 9 million views, and regularly posts to her Ginger the Golden Retriever’s Fan Page on Facebook.

But another reason is that it turns out that dogs are best possible thing to cast in a remake of the trailer of a mainstream Hollywood BDSM film, according to our top 10 animals or things to cast in a remake of the trailer of a mainstream Hollywood BDSM film, which we haven’t had a chance to consult until now.

Dogster’s top 10 animals or things to cast in a remake of the trailer of a mainstream Hollywood BDSM film

1. Rocks
2. Hamsters
3. Chinchillas
4. Hairdryers
5. Blowfish
6. Alligators
7. Blue whales
8. Scorpions
9. Ross and Rachel from Friends. Also Phoebe.
10. Dogs

Read about dogs in the news on Dogster:

• Would “Candy’s Law” Solve the Problem of Cops Killing Dogs?
• What Do You Do During a Tornado When Your Dog Is Barred from the Storm Shelter?
• In One Touching Video, An Alzheimer’s Patient Speaks Again — To the Family Dog