Pizza-Stealing Dog Gets Caught in Oregon — But Not in Time

A family has a delicious pizza not only stolen but also eaten right in front of their horrified eyes.


An Oregon woman and her family had a hot, delicious pepperoni pizza in the backseat of their car earlier this week, the smell filling the vehicle and wafting into afternoon air. They had just come from WinCo Foods. The pizza was still hot — maybe not bubbling-hot, but (we like to think) still toasty enough to give you pause, like a pizza should.

The Figuroa family set about unloading their car in front of their house, anticipating eating the pizza. Did we mention the smell of the pizza? All that pepperoni and cheese? Wafting into the afternoon air?

Wafting right into the nose of a Husky in the yard next door, a Husky that did not in fact belong to those neighbors?

Suddenly, all was madness. The Husky was in the backseat of the car, barking, scaring the Figuroa family. The Husky was eating the pizza! Nineteen-year-old Alondra Figuroa screamed at the dog, and the Husky screamed back (he “aggressively barked,” according to the news reports).

So Alondra called the police. Perhaps she had written off the pizza at this point; perhaps she was still hoping for a slice or two. We don’t know. Reporters did not ask those questions.

When a deputy from Marion County Sheriff’s Office arrived, he didn’t have to piece the story together from differing eyewitness accounts, because the Husky was still in the backseat of the car eating the pizza.

And the deputy had just as much success as the Figuroa family in getting the dog to stop eating the pizza and exit the car. The Husky “responded aggressively” to the deputy. He called for backup, and soon the Marion County Dog Control Unit was on the scene.

Dog Control officer Karen Hilfiker, to her credit, had no trouble removing the dog from the vehicle. Perhaps she let the Husky finish the pizza. That’s what we would have done. Though, that leaves exactly zero pizza for the Figuroa family, which would be a tragedy. Such is life.

Was this a scary dog on the loose? We’re not sure. It’s likely that the dog was simply starving. It turns out the family who owns the dog had posted a “lost dog” report on the county website just that afternoon. The Husky, named Eysak (don’t worry about it), had escaped from the family’s yard. We don’t know how long he was loose, but long enough to work up the appetite to stage a brazen pizza theft and literally do nothing to escape. He could have dragged the pizza into the woods or something, right?

Authorities found a clue for the dog’s behavior on his collar, which contained an inscription.

“Don’t Mess with My Food,” it reads.


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