In case any of you were thinking, Enough about the man who brought you Buttercup already, I’d like to talk about this extraordinary dog and what a wonderful addition she is to my six-pack of K9s. She’s living proofthat shelter mutts make perfect pets.
Not only isshe extremely pretty, with a white head, brown body, and white-tipped tail; she also has a pink-spotted nose andgolden eyes,plus three beauty marks: oneat the outer corner ofeach eye and one on the very top of her head.
Her personality is upbeat and affectionate, and she loves to smile and roll on her back for belly rubs. She’s perfectly housetrained, and even prefers doing her business in the gutter instead of on the sidewalk.
She doesn’t scarf food off the street like so many formerly starving dogs do. But even if she did,her iron stomach could handle it:Unlike many of my other dogs (and myself), she’s not delicate in the digestive department. She extrudes picture-perfect poops. What’s more, she’s not a resource guarder or a barker.
Her only strange behavioral quirk is an unfortunatetendency to molest cars passing by at high speeds. She actually tries to charge at them. We’ll definitely need to work on modifying this, in order to prevent a tragedy.
Her only flaw is nother fault: It’s the name they hung on her.
I know she’s sweet and all, but Buttercup? Come on. I already have a dog named Cupcake who arrived herewith that handle, andthe namestuck because she knew it. We can’t have a Cupcake and a Buttercup living in the same animal house. Buttercupcake: Gag me.
Ienjoy coming up with couture-quality handles that fit each individualbeast I’m charged with naming. Sometimes, however, my creative efforts are thwarted. My sweet little foster Maltese came to me from the shelter with the name Sasha. How boring, I thought. Since she was found straying the streets of Brooklyn and she’s 13 years old, I wanted to rename her Cabiriain honorof the Fellinimasterpiece “Nights of Cabiria,” a jewel in the Criterion Collection of classic films on DVD.After all, the little creature is petite, Italian, and a middle-aged streetwalker with a heart of gold – just like Fellini’s immortal heroine.
Except my little Cabiria stayed several weeks at the excellent clinic of the Humane Society of New York, undergoing various testsand getting her health in tip-top shape – and all her health records listed her name as”Sasha.” I forgot to write “Cabiria” on her initial paperwork, so everyone at the Societycalled her Sasha, andthat’sthe name that stuck.
Buttercup, on the other hand, doesn’t really respond to her shelter name, so she’s open to suggestions. I’ve got itnarrowed down to two appealing options: Principessa Francesca Carolina (Frankie for short), a hat tip to the Italian heritage of the woman who rescued her and the man who transported her.
The full name sounds quite regal, I think, which is fitting: K9 Buttercup looks like a pretty princess, but she has the attitude of a tomboy, so the nickname Frankie works too.
My other option is Mayday, to mark the day in May she came to stay – and the S.O.S. her rescuer issued on her behalf. This namehas a nice edge to it thanks to the James Bond flick “A View to a Kill,” which stars Grace Jones asthe femme fatale Mayday. This, I think,would add some spice to Buttercup’s sugary sweetness.
So, Dogsters, what’ll it be: Frankie or Mayday? Please cast your vote in the comments!